Mind Shift from Big Life Journal
If you follow the UUCT Parenting Club on Facebook, you'll remember the resources I've shared from Big Life Journal. While most of their resources are for purchase, they send freebies weekly, which are also pretty awesome. This week, Aleandra's message is one I wanted to share with you all. Read below for her reflections.
sending you all love and light,
Since we're talking about entering the new school year, I want to offer my related parenting tip (which might sound more like a mindset shift...)
Many of us are concerned whether or not our children are being traumatized by the current experience they're going through.
Not being able to see friends, feeling lonely and isolated—what does this do to our kids?
I suggest we (adults) shift our perspective from "This is traumatizing my child" to "This is helping my child build resilience for the lifetime.”
Think about it...this time is a great opportunity to PREPARE them for all the difficult situations they will be facing in the future.
Remember, our character, our resilience muscles, our growth mindset are being built when the times are TOUGH, not when everything is going well.
We can COACH our children how to face the difficult times, share our coping techniques with them, and demonstrate that we can find gratitude even in the hardest of times.
More importantly, we don't need to prevent our children from feeling difficult emotions like loneliness, sadness, or disappointment.
What we can do is to offer our emotional support and coach them through these BIG feelings.
You can say something like:
"I know this is very hard. You feel lonely. You wish you could see all your friends and go to the same places as before. It's tough to deal with the things we cannot control. In these situations, what helps me is to focus on what I CAN do instead. I like to think about what I GET to do rather than what I cannot do. Like finding a new interesting hobby or learning something fun."
So we're coaching our child about how to deal with situations they cannot control and what things they can do to find ways to feel better.
I hope this was helpful!
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Big Life Journal, creator